Learn to love your emotions
I’m just as guilty as anyone of fighting against my emotions and resisting what I’m feeling. It’s hard to even pinpoint what the emotion is sometimes! In different stages of my life I’ve had to work on getting comfortable with particular emotions, while others were easily accessible.
I know for some sadness is hard, while for others anger is hard. Learning to lean into the ones that make us most uncomfortable is a powerful act. I’d even say an act of courage.
I’ve been reflecting on emotions a lot recently. Things I’ve been paying attention to:
How what I eat impacts my emotions
How sleepy I can become when I ignore what I’m feeling
How distraction is avoidance of a particular feeling
How boredom covers up something deeper that’s going on
How powerful reflection can be for uncovering what I’m feeling
How acknowledging rather than avoiding what I’m feeling sets me a little closer to being free from my emotions controlling me
These things I’m paying attention to aren’t necessarily new, they are familiar but showing up in new ways and sound a little different than before. I think we keep learning some lessons in our lives and I also think we need to access these lessons in new ways at times. It’s like looking in the mirror from a different angle to see a new curve of our body or line on our face. Our body and face isn’t new but the perspective is new.
Here are a few tips on mindset to learn to love your emotions:
There are no bad or good emotions, just emotions
Lean in a little closer than is comfortable
Pay attention to your shoulds and turn them into wants, and needs rather than shaming yourself!
Happy is not the only way you have to be or show up
Listen to your emotions for important data about yourself
Emotional agility (the ability to be with yourself in a way that is courageous and curious and compassionate) as Susan David calls it in her research is like a daily practice. A daily practice of any kind: yoga, meditation, running, writing, reading or anything else that becomes a habit and routine. Our emotions don’t just take care of themselves, we have to take care of them. I’d say even tend to them like we do our physical body. I learn to love my emotions in new ways every day. I hope you do too!
Here is a wonderful Ted Talk by Susan David about emotions related to this content in case you want to explore this topic more deeply:
https://www.ted.com/talks/susan_david_the_gift_and_power_of_emotional_courage
